Although they total only a fraction of a percent of Thailand’s female population, there is a large number of Thai women who prefer to have foreign husbands and boyfriends. I don’t have any facts and figures, but my guess is the percentage of Thai women seeking foreign husbands and boyfriends is higher than in most other countries. But why ?
I’m not going to argue, the majority of Thai girls working the bars in Thailand’s popular tourist hot-spots like Pattaya, Bangkok, Phuket, Koh Samui, Hua Hin and Chiang Mai are very money orientated. Thai bar girls are commonly from poor families, poorly educated, and with little prospect of progressing on to a high paid job or career. Their best chance of escaping poverty is to marry a rich man, or at least a man who can offer some financial security. The average single male foreigner visiting Pattaya (for example) supposedly meets that criteria. and well, he just happens to be on the hunt for a single Thai girl, just like her.
What about the other kind of Thai woman, she’s not poor, she’s not a bar girl. She could be anything from a nurse to a lawyer, a student to a successful business woman. She earns a good salary, and doesn’t expect her foreign boyfriend or husband to pay for everything. For them, there is obviously something more appealing about foreign men than money. At least that’s the way it would appear to me, but I’m just forming opinions here. There is also no reason why money could not be the agenda in a more indirect way. Independent, self supporting Thai women just might prefer foreign partners because they are financial equals, meaning they can maintain their own financial independence.
Status Symbol
I you have ever dated a Thai bar girl, did you notice how she made a point taking you to places where she had friends or family, for example, she would take you back to her bar, to her favorite eating places, or to meet her sister or cousin. She is basically showing them her new status, you.
Experimenting With Foreign Boyfriends
Financially independent career minded single Thai women have time on their hands, they are in no rush to marry and start a family. They may seek a foreign boyfriend just for the experience, for sexual and social experimentation, and to compare foreign men to their Thai counterparts.
Foreign Men are More Faithful than Thai Men
Up until 1935 polygamy was legal in Thailand. A man could have a wife, plus a minor wife (mistress), known as a mia noi. And believe it or not, he could have a third wife who he visited purely for sex. Internet references refer to the Thai mans third wife during that era as a sex slave.
Monogamy is not a quality which Thai men are noted for. Although polygamy is no longer legal in Thailand, and is a practice which often results in bloody retribution by his spouse, many Thai men do carry on the practice of keeping a second wife, in most cases this is still the norm, and considered acceptable by most Thai women.
I’m not saying foreign men don’t practice polygamy. The difference is, Thai men might expect their wife to accept it, but a foreign man usually would not.
Thai Men Don’t Want Them
There is a widespread belief that Thai men do not like to “marry down”, meaning they do not want to marry a woman from a poorer social class or background. This obviously means the average Thai girl who chooses to work the bar would find it difficult to find a wealthy Thai husband. Thai men are also said to be very reluctant to date divorcees, widowers and single mothers, which in turn leaves Thai women in those categories no option but to seek a foreign partner.
Thai Women Prefer the Look of Western Men
Whether it is for their sex appeal, their oriental look, or their Thai ways and mannerisms, Thai girls are very appealing to many men. Just as Latino and Scandinavian women are appealing to other men.
There’s no accounting for taste, so there is no reason why a Thai woman should not simply prefer the Western, Arabic, African, or whatever look a foreign man has. Yes, it really could be that simple, could it not ?
What do I Think
Personally, I believe the small percentage of Thai women who prefer foreign men do so for many different reasons, including all of those covered on this page. During my time living in Thailand I have seen all kinds of relationships. I have seen many foreigners with a stunningly beautiful “trophy wife”. I’ve known elderly foreigners who’s wife seems to be blatantly waiting for him to die. I have some younger friends who attract the attention of, and court successful, rich young Thai women so wealthy they own their own Mercedes Benz
I’m happy to say I know some fabulously happy Thai/Western couples, they have fantastic relationships and share a genuine love for each other regardless of race, culture, color or money. I don’t know how, where, or why they met. It doesn’t matter if it’s convenient, because the truth is, it usually is for both.
Darren C